Apple TV's New Show Is Basically Just a Divorce Simulator

Look, I don't know who at Apple TV+ keeps greenlighting prestige dramas about wealthy people being miserable to each other in gorgeous locations, but that person deserves a raise and possibly a wellness check. The streamer's latest offering, *Last Seen*, is the television equivalent of watching your neighbors' marriage implode through a Ring camera—except everyone's wearing $400 cashmere and the cinematography makes you feel poor. The premise: a tech mogul's wife vanishes from their Marin County compound, and over eight episodes we learn that literally everyone in this family is a liar. Groundbreaking. Never seen that before. Next you'll tell me the detective has a drinking problem. And yes, the detective has a drinking problem. Apple clearly looked at the success of *The Morning Show*, *Big Little Lies*, and every other show where beautiful people scream at each other in kitchens, and said "more please, but make it foggy." *Last Seen* is shot in that signature Apple TV+ palette—all moody blues and muted grays, like someone put a Instagram filter on depression. The cast is, admittedly, stacked. You've got a two-time Oscar winner doing the "grieving husband with a secret" thing, a British actress playing the icy mother-in-law, and a rising star as the daughter who's clearly been in therapy since birth. Everyone's acting their face off. It's just that the script gives them nothing to do but stare meaningfully at laptops. Here's the thing about these shows: they're engineered to be bingeable. Every episode ends on a cliffhanger so manipulative you'd think the writers were being held hostage. Episode three literally ends with someone opening a door. That's it. A door. And I watched the next episode immediately, so joke's on me, I guess. The show also suffers from what I call "Apple TV+ Syndrome," where the production values are so absurdly high that the story feels less like entertainment and more like a flex. Every frame looks like a commercial for a luxury car you can't afford. There's a scene where two characters argue about infidelity while sailing, and I'm supposed to feel tension but mostly I'm wondering how much that boat costs per hour. Is it good? Define good. It's watchable in the way that scrolling through your ex's Instagram at 2 AM is watchable. You know it's bad for you, but you can't stop. The mystery is compelling enough, even if you've solved it by episode four like everyone else with a functioning frontal lobe. The real question is whether we needed another show about rich people problems. We didn't. But we'll watch it anyway, because the alternative is talking to our own families, and frankly, that sounds worse. **Final take:** *Last Seen* is well-acted, beautifully shot, and completely unnecessary—which is basically Apple TV+'s entire business model. Watch it if you've already finished everything else, or if you just want to feel better about your own dysfunctional relationships. Three stars. Would argue about it at Thanksgiving.